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English Article
2007-05-23
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http://lomo-monster.blogbus.com/logs/5481414.html
昨天下班前突然想到在EF的在线课堂上做了一篇作文,仿佛回到了小学的时候,但要用英文来作文
Topic:Describe your changing world
Write 70 - 100 words
How has your world changed in the last 5 or 10 years ? Is it better or worse than before ? Wirte a short article describing the modern world and comparing it to life 10 year ago.虽然只要求写70-100字,但洋洋洒洒的写了一通就submit了,
今天早上得到了老师的批复
Hello Gao:
I am an Englishtown writing teacher. I read and corrected your writing. I hope you will find the corrections helpful. Please keep up the good work.
Topic:Describe your changing world
Write 70 - 100 words
Your writing with Corrections
My life was changed (AG)(>>had changed)from the 2001's summer(WO)(>>summer of 2001). I passed the exam of the university entry(WO)(>>university entrance exam).Then, I came (WW)(>>got)into the (D)(>>)university, majoring in Law. Actually, I don't like the university very mucn(SP)(>>much), (PU)(>>:)if I have (AG)(>>had)a choice to change it (PU)(>>,)I would like to choose a better one and the (WW)(>>an)other major which I like(PS)(>>d). But anyway, I have (D)(>>)graduated from it and found a job using it. Now, I am working for the (AR)(>>a)consulting company about sourcing which is diferent (SP)(>>different)from my major. So (PU)(>>,)I always confused (PS)(>>)whether I need to change it and what I want to do indeed?10 years ago,I am (VT)(>>was)a goung(D)(>>) in the (D)(>>)middle school and have (AG)(>>had)a lot of dreams about (I(x))(>>the)future and(I(x))(>>what) I can do for it.The difference between my modern world and 10 years ago is wheter (SP)(>>whether)I have the dream of(AR)(>>the) future still....?
For the editing marks that I used show an incorrect word or phrase, please refer to the list at the end of this document
Overall Teacher Comments
You handled the topic with confidence today. You were able to write with enthusiasm and skill showing a great deal of confidence.Singular subjects need singular verbs; plural subjects need plural verbs.Use a comma before a co-coordinating conjunction that joins independent clauses.The definite article "the" (invariable in form) designates a person, place, or event, which has been specified or defined by the speaker.Reading books and magazines will help enhance your language skills and vocabulary. Good luck-Sharon
Writing Grade:80%
Kind regards
Sharon_I
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Lead Writing Instructor
Talk to the World!
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Writing Editing Remarks
AG=agreement(I AM, she IS)
AR=article (a, an, the)
C=capitalisation
CO=combine sentences
D=delete
EX=expression or idiom
I(x)=insert x
MW=missing word
NS=new sentence
NSW=no such word
PH=phraseology
PL=plural
PO=possessivePR=preposition
PS=part of speech
PU=punctuation
SI=singular
SP=spelling
VT=verb tense
WO=word order
WW=wrong word
x>>y=change from x to y随机文章:
辞职后续 2008-08-21又一个辞职报告打了上去。。。。 2008-08-20你还会写情书嘛? 2008-08-19刘翔倒下的一霎那 2008-08-18让我纳闷的印度人。。。 2008-08-18
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评论
In aadition,where there is will,there is a way,you shou chosen you love ting to do,and try you best! crazy spirit!!
zzy
Actually,so far,I haven't english name.Sometimes, I use "Gao Si" in the email , but I found one of the Chinese colleague (VP) always forget my name according to the pronunciation.Angry! So I want to have a charming english name,haha,maybe you and Dave can give some good ideas for me.
保重啊!